Online Dating from A to Z: Ignoring the Indecisive

Welcome to the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge. This month I’ll be working my way through the alphabet, one day at a time, on the subject of Online Dating. If you’ve never visited my blog before, I’m happy you’re here! Be sure to check out my previous A to Z Challenge posts and the books that were inspired by them for more alphabetical fun.

I is for Ignoring the Indecisive.

There’s nothing worse than trying to make plans with someone who’s chronically indecisive. Even asking a simple question like “What do you want to do for lunch?” can result in the dreaded “I don’t know, what do you want to do?”

If you’re that indecisive about whether you want a sandwich or a salad, you’re definitely never going to get anywhere with online dating!

There is no bigger turnoff than someone who can’t make up their mind – unless it’s the person who thinks that by turning the question back to you they are somehow “going with the flow.” As a woman who knows exactly what she wants, I have to say that men who did this during the dating process automatically got placed into the “Not My Type” pile.

PRO TIP: If you really have no preference (or answer to the question), at least toss out an idea – good, bad or indifferent. Part of your job, as an online dater, is to keep the conversation flowing. Most people don’t ask questions in order to get them bounced right back to them, as if they are talking to themselves in the mirror; they actually want to know what you are thinking. So please, share!

And if you’ve ever caught yourself playing the “I don’t know, what do you want to do?” card, in the hopes of seeming affable or not making waves, please cease and desist. Speaking your mind is an important trait. If you can’t be up front and honest with someone before you even begin dating them, what hope is there in your future?

Indecision isn’t cute or friendly, it’s annoying and dishonest. Ban that behavior and watch your dates improve.

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  • NameNameRed

    I never thought of this in relation to online dating. I realized long ago that, to end that “I don’t care, what do you want?” loop, I could give some opposition or suggestion: “I really don’t want Mexican. I had it for lunch,” or “Either Chinese or pizza, but delivery.”
    Here in Beijing, we almost always order in. If I don’t have an idea, I’ll say, “When you pick a restaurant, let me see and I’ll choose something from there.”

  • Printed Portal

    I always get in an endless loop over making decisions about food. I now have a list of suggestions to work from.

    Just stopping by from the #AtoZChallenge Road Trip!