Enter the .ninja

My hosting provider recently sent me an email that piqued my curiosity:

Apparently they’re now offering .ninja domain names.

That’s right: I can now call my website LauraRoberts.ninja to indicate my stealth and cunning. How awesome is that?

Okay, the bad news is that Ninja.ninja is already taken. (Boo, hiss!) But it’s been making me think about all the magical possibilities for this new domain extension. I mean, since I write about ninjas, this is obviously right in my area of expertise. I would be stupid NOT to buy a .ninja domain, right?

Of course, the reason they have started giving out .ninja domains is because they equate “ninja” with “guru.” To me, these are decidedly NOT synonyms. A ninja is quick, stealthy and deadly – a hired assassin who will ruthlessly go for whatever his (or her) objective. A guru is the guy you see meditating on a rug in the lotus position, thinking about world peace. Or the guy who is trying to swindle you into buying his next online course about how to sell ice to penguins in the Antarctic. Ew.

“Guru” stinks of “sham,” for me. And, equally so, if you’re using the term “ninja” to generally mean “master” or “expert,” I think you’re doing it wrong. (Also, can I just say  that calling yourself a Ninja is, like, sooooo 2013?) So while I am certainly a ninja enthusiast, I am not actually a ninja. I can differentiate between fantasy and reality, unlike a lot of the characters who are no doubt gobbling up .ninja domains as I type this.

In sum, although I am tickled by the idea of being able to own a .ninja domain, ultimately I don’t think I will invest. After all, people are already confused enough by the Button Tapir.

Would you invest in a .ninja domain?