Dear Mr. President,

I appreciate getting emails from the President of the United States. I think it’s pretty cool that we have a President who is actually interested in representing the people he works for, and is always trying to find out what We The People really think.

But I have a quibble with the way you and your staff address me in these emails.

Recently, I received an email from “Barack Obama” (info@barackobama.com) with the subject line “Hey.”

I wish I were kidding.

Screenshot of the offending email; I can’t make this stuff up (click to embiggen)

At first I thought your message was spam and trashed it accordingly. Do you see how powerful subject lines can be, Mr. Obama?

Now, I’m not saying you can’t be a bit casual when you email me. I like a President who’s friendly, and something along the lines of “Howdy friend,” is fine by me as a greeting. But “Hey” as a subject line? That’s just… weird.

And really spammy/creepy.

So, nothing personal, but until your people hire a decent copywriter to fix this problem, Mr. Obama, I’m deleting all your emails unread. If they’re really important, and you really want me to read them, I’d suggest hiring some new copywriters, stat.

Might I suggest… someone like me? I’ve got experience writing newsletters, in case you’re interested, and I’m not that expensive, either. Feel free to message me back if you want to take me up on this offer; you’ve got my email, right?

Looking forward to another four years,
Laura Roberts